Open Letter to My Son on His Birthday

Dear Big Kid Bear,

Twelve years ago when you were in my belly, we were told that you would be born with Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus. The doctors said you may not be able to walk without adaptive equipment. They said you would have some challenges and developmental delays. That didn't stop us from giving you a chance to prove them wrong. Eleven years ago, on a cold, snowy Thursday morning just like today, you made your grand entrance into this world! My first of two blessings!  (Truth be told, I evicted you because I couldn't wait to meet you!)

We were both given tough roles, my bear. You didn't ask to be born with SB and yet you were given the task to live with whatever challenges SB brought you. I, too, was given a task to help you overcome any challenges that came your way. To get you the right services and help you to become an independent citizen of this world. And today, 11 years later, you are here with us. We were told you might not be able to walk, and yet here you are, walking without assistance. You've become such a smart, funny, caring and loving young man. You were fortunate to never have had to have a shunt revision in all your years to treat your hydrocephalus. Many kids with SB who have shunts tend to have multiple revisions in their lives. You read, write and make up funny stories. You've got an incredible memory. You impress us all with your profound knowledge of geography, animals, their habitats and dinosaurs. Maybe one day you will become a zoologist, a paleontologist or a wildlife biologist. You can be whatever you want to be and we will be here to support you. 

Two years ago, you were given another diagnosis. That being Autism. I know you don't quite understand what that means right now, but don't worry. We're here. Always have and always will. You may have been born with SB and been diagnosed with Autism but guess what buddy? SB and Autism do not define you. Do not ever let anyone tell you otherwise. We will go on this journey together. 

I hope that one day you are able to read this blog and understand. We are fighters baby. There's nothing you cannot overcome unless you give up.  Your name alone means "victory of the people" - victors do not give up. There was a reason I named you with your given name. And you've been living up to that name. You've overcome some challenges so far. No, we are not done, but I will not let you fall. We will always be by your side.

 I know I may be tough on you at times, but it's only because I know your potential.  I believe that you are the little engine that could. And one day, you'll be the little engine that DID.

Today, I just want to wish you a happy birthday, bear. We are so proud of the handsome, smart young man you're turning out to be. May God bless you always. I love you with every ounce of my being. I love you today. I love you tomorrow. I love you forever and ever. The end. 




Location: Allerton Bronx

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